So, here we go. I will be using my annotated bibliography and some of the other sources that I've looked at, even just as references to keep me on-track. I have an idea of what paragraphs I want to write and a little bit of what I want to say. My goal: get my preliminary thoughts on paper. It will be a more skeletal draft than I'm used to writing, but it's a start.
Update
So I ended up with less sources and more thoughts, which I thought was fine for a super messy, preliminary write-up. I think I did get down my most basic outline, which was the goal. Again, sorry that it's so choppy:
The concept of “timshel” is very valid and well-supported
in this epic novel. It is the character of Lee, the Chinese immigrant who
raises Adam’s twin boys Aron and Caleb, who goes by “Cal”. During his years of
research on the Bible, Lee discovers that in the original Hebrew, the word
given with God’s commands is “timshel,” meaning “thou mayest.” Lee then states
that “[this] might be the most
important word in the world. That says the way is open. That throws it right
back on a man” to choose his own actions rather than being forced to do
anything. (301) This is an empowering idea, as this allows all people to
act freely, but it is also a responsibility and accountability for one’s own
actions. No one is forced to do anything, so they must live with the
consequences of whatever they choose to do. This is shown very poignantly in
the final meeting of Cathy, then Kate, and her husband Adam. When Adam finds
her in her prostitution house, Kate believes that, just as before, she can use
manipulation to gain power of her former husband. But Adam chose to confront
her and his feelings of love for her, and in doing so, he saw her as she truly
was. He could not be fooled anymore and he was free to act. He even “laughed
because he knew that [she didn’t matter]” to him anymore. (323) Parallel to his
choices are Kate’s very purposeful actions. She chose again and again to lash
out and hurt Adam as much as she could with her blackmail, her lies and affair,
and her sexuality. But Adam realizes and declares to her that she “hate[s] the
good in [others] that [she] can’t get at,” which is “something [that she] can’t
understand.” (321) Yet even though she, as a sociopath, cannot understand
goodness the way that others can, she still puts for real effort to ruin
others. That is not just her nature—it is her conscious decision. She becomes
bound by her horrible, selfish choices when she loses power over Adam and
therefore can no longer make choices for them both in the situation.
Yet there is a paradox, for even though every person has
the ability to choose for themselves, they each have a unique drive that causes
them to choose the things that they do. There is something that motivates each
person that causes them to act differently from others, and this thing can be
defining. When Adam is forced to think again about Cathy, he must choose how to
respond. Lee tells him that even though he is facing a choice, “[his] course is drawn. What [he] will do
is written—written in every breath [he’s] ever taken” (376). Human
thought and habits are both consistent and persistent. It is difficult to break
free of our usual thoughts processes and perceptions.
But it is a
person’s right to choose that course, whatever their reasoning, that Steinbeck
so highly praises. He declares that he would “fight for” every person’s right
to make their own decisions because “the free, exploring mind of the individual human is the most
valuable thing in the world.” This
is the thing that, above anything else, Steinbeck believes and wants others to
know—that every person can and should make their own choices and should also rejoice
in the fact that they can. He seems to find strength in the idea that we make
our choices free of outside influences, even our nurture, as this takes away
the most precious “freedom of the mind to take any direction it wishes,
undirected.” In this way we come to rely more on ourselves and our
personal progress as we journey through life rather than be shaped by the
circumstances and factors outside of our control. For Steinbeck, as shown in this
epic novel, this is the crowning glory of mankind—to be one’s own person and
make their own decisions for themselves.
