My Writing: Courtney Smith

There were lots of opportunities for growth this semester. One thing that I had never done before was creating different types of thesis statements. (This post is "Thesis Statements" on February 1st.)  It was interesting learning about what types of thesis statements there were, which is useful because the thesis is such an essential part of the paper. I think I can use this as a tool in the future to fine-tune my theses and make sure I am expressing the right ideas. I've also been able to experiment with things that I had never been exposed to before; for example, when writing the "playful pre-write," (I posted this as "Playful Pre-writing" on March 14th) I was able to get a better sense of where my thesis was headed.  It was a great way to try different paths of thinking and use a variety of things to develop more solid ideas about what kind of paper I wanted to write. In the past I did not have creative ways of approaching a paper, so this brought in new ideas and helped me to really absorb the text. It was also good for me because I am an outline addict--I outline absolutely everything that I possibly can so that I can see my work start to finish. I did this thorough outline for the Donne paper (entitled "Writing Plan and Record: Courtney Smith" and posted on January 16th) but didn't for the last paper. I think it helped me to try different types of pre-writing and do whatever felt comfortable for me at the time, since getting started can seem impossibly hard at the beginning. There was also, of course, plenty of practice researching, which was a great experience.

One thing that was helpful for me was the partner writing that we did for the final research paper. There was enough flexibility that we could make this process our own while still having the structure of reporting to someone that you were writing. It was also nice to discuss ideas with other people, especially on the final research paper. Even just working through ideas out loud brought new thoughts to me that I hadn't had before. Sharing during any and all of the writing process is a stretch for me, since generally writing is strictly individual during most of my school years, but it was good for me to see the benefits of branching out a bit.

East of Eden Drafting: Take Two

Okay friends, this post needs a huge disclaimer: this draft is a complete and utter MESS. I had a weird headache and I was still mentally drafting (my bad for not planning ahead a little better...) so this is awful. I'm actually embarrassed to post it, haha. But please know that if the middle doesn't make any sense, it's not supposed to yet--I'm working on it :)

The concept of “timshel” is very valid and well-supported in this epic novel. It is the character of Lee, the Chinese immigrant who raises Adam’s twin boys Aron and Caleb, who goes by “Cal”. During his years of research on the Bible, Lee discovers that in the original Hebrew, the word given with God’s commands is “timshel,” meaning “thou mayest.” Lee then states that “[this] might be the most important word in the world. That says the way is open. That throws it right back on a man” to choose his own actions rather than being forced to do anything. (301) This is an empowering idea, as this allows all people to act freely, but it is also a responsibility and accountability for one’s own actions. No one is forced to do anything, so they must live with the consequences of whatever they choose to do. This is shown very poignantly in the final meeting of Cathy, then Kate, and her husband Adam. When Adam finds her in her prostitution house, Kate believes that, just as before, she can use manipulation to gain power of her former husband. But Adam chose to confront her and his feelings of love for her, and in doing so, he saw her as she truly was. He could not be fooled anymore and he was free to act. He even “laughed because he knew that [she didn’t matter]” to him anymore. (323) Parallel to his choices are Kate’s very purposeful actions. She chose again and again to lash out and hurt Adam as much as she could with her blackmail, her lies and affair, and her sexuality. But Adam realizes and declares to her that she “hate[s] the good in [others] that [she] can’t get at,” which is “something [that she] can’t understand.” (321) Yet even though she, as a sociopath, cannot understand goodness the way that others can, she still puts for real effort to ruin others. That is not just her nature—it is her conscious decision. She becomes bound by her horrible, selfish choices when she loses power over Adam and therefore can no longer make choices for them both in the situation.

            Yet there is a paradox, for even though every person has the ability to choose for themselves, they each have a unique drive that causes them to choose the things that they do. There is something that motivates each person that causes them to act differently from others, and this thing can be defining. When Adam is forced to think again about Cathy, he must choose how to respond. Lee tells him that even though he is facing a choice, “[his] course is drawn. What [he] will do is written—written in every breath [he’s] ever taken” (376). Human thought and habits are both consistent and persistent. It is difficult to break free of our usual thoughts processes and perceptions.

            Steinbeck seems to take this a step further as he suggests that our nurturing styles and interactions are influenced by our nature. As Adam thought back to his relationship with Cathy, he asked Samuel if she had truly even been beautiful like he had always thought. Samuel replied that “to [him] she was because [he] built her” (260). Adam has a pure heart and a good soul, and he saw these qualities in Cathy even though they were not there at all. He reflected himself onto her. Cathy did the same with her customers at her prostitution house; she insisted on reducing every man into an animal by seeing and exploiting only their flaws.

            Steinbeck does realize, however, that nature can be improved upon or ruined by one’s nurture. The character Samuel argues that although “You can’t make a race horse of a pig,” a person “can make a very fast pig” (260). He feels strongly that one’s children “will be what you expect of them.” There is a responsibility given to parents to encourage the very best in their children, if for no reason but to draw on the better parts of their nature.

            Embracing the best parts of one’s nature can be a very healthy process. Near the beginning of the story, the reader learns that Cathy began her rampage early in her life, when she realized that she took pleasure in other’s pain. When she was a teenager, she did many horrible things, including locking her parents and burning down the house with them inside. This is symbolic of Cathy rejecting her nurture and only embracing her own nature. Because she only chose the most evil parts of herself,

            But it is a person’s right to choose that course, whatever their reasoning, that Steinbeck so highly praises. He declares that he would “fight for” every person’s right to make their own decisions because “the free, exploring mind of the individual human is the most valuable thing in the world.”  This is the thing that, above anything else, Steinbeck believes and wants others to know—that every person can and should make their own choices and should also rejoice in the fact that they can. He seems to find strength in the idea that we make our choices free of outside influences, even our nurture, as this takes away the most precious “freedom of the mind to take any direction it wishes, undirected.” In this way we come to rely more on ourselves and our personal progress as we journey through life rather than be shaped by the circumstances and factors outside of our control. For Steinbeck, as shown in this epic novel, this is the crowning glory of mankind—to be one’s own person and make their own decisions for themselves.

East of Eden Writing

Next Steps and Draft

So, here we go. I will be using my annotated bibliography and some of the other sources that I've looked at, even just as references to keep me on-track. I have an idea of what paragraphs I want to write and a little bit of what I want to say. My goal: get my preliminary thoughts on paper. It will be a more skeletal draft than I'm used to writing, but it's a start.

Update
So I ended up with less sources and more thoughts, which I thought was fine for a super messy, preliminary write-up. I think I did get down my most basic outline, which was the goal. Again, sorry that it's so choppy:

            The concept of “timshel” is very valid and well-supported in this epic novel. It is the character of Lee, the Chinese immigrant who raises Adam’s twin boys Aron and Caleb, who goes by “Cal”. During his years of research on the Bible, Lee discovers that in the original Hebrew, the word given with God’s commands is “timshel,” meaning “thou mayest.” Lee then states that “[this] might be the most important word in the world. That says the way is open. That throws it right back on a man” to choose his own actions rather than being forced to do anything. (301) This is an empowering idea, as this allows all people to act freely, but it is also a responsibility and accountability for one’s own actions. No one is forced to do anything, so they must live with the consequences of whatever they choose to do. This is shown very poignantly in the final meeting of Cathy, then Kate, and her husband Adam. When Adam finds her in her prostitution house, Kate believes that, just as before, she can use manipulation to gain power of her former husband. But Adam chose to confront her and his feelings of love for her, and in doing so, he saw her as she truly was. He could not be fooled anymore and he was free to act. He even “laughed because he knew that [she didn’t matter]” to him anymore. (323) Parallel to his choices are Kate’s very purposeful actions. She chose again and again to lash out and hurt Adam as much as she could with her blackmail, her lies and affair, and her sexuality. But Adam realizes and declares to her that she “hate[s] the good in [others] that [she] can’t get at,” which is “something [that she] can’t understand.” (321) Yet even though she, as a sociopath, cannot understand goodness the way that others can, she still puts for real effort to ruin others. That is not just her nature—it is her conscious decision. She becomes bound by her horrible, selfish choices when she loses power over Adam and therefore can no longer make choices for them both in the situation.

            Yet there is a paradox, for even though every person has the ability to choose for themselves, they each have a unique drive that causes them to choose the things that they do. There is something that motivates each person that causes them to act differently from others, and this thing can be defining. When Adam is forced to think again about Cathy, he must choose how to respond. Lee tells him that even though he is facing a choice, “[his] course is drawn. What [he] will do is written—written in every breath [he’s] ever taken” (376). Human thought and habits are both consistent and persistent. It is difficult to break free of our usual thoughts processes and perceptions.

            But it is a person’s right to choose that course, whatever their reasoning, that Steinbeck so highly praises. He declares that he would “fight for” every person’s right to make their own decisions because “the free, exploring mind of the individual human is the most valuable thing in the world.”  This is the thing that, above anything else, Steinbeck believes and wants others to know—that every person can and should make their own choices and should also rejoice in the fact that they can. He seems to find strength in the idea that we make our choices free of outside influences, even our nurture, as this takes away the most precious “freedom of the mind to take any direction it wishes, undirected.” In this way we come to rely more on ourselves and our personal progress as we journey through life rather than be shaped by the circumstances and factors outside of our control. For Steinbeck, as shown in this epic novel, this is the crowning glory of mankind—to be one’s own person and make their own decisions for themselves.

East of Eden Bibliography

I honestly still have no idea what I want my thesis to be, but in my brainstorming and research, I focused primarily on Cal and Cathy and what we learn about morality from their characters.

       Because of this, my working thesis is: "The characters of Cal and Cathy shows that one's nature is more influential than one's nurture in making moral choices."

Sources:
(1) Segal, Nancy L. Born Together. N.p.: Harvard University Press, 2012. Web. 21 Mar. 2016. [Online Book]
This is a report on twin studies that looks at the similarities between habits and quality of life for twins separated at birth. It is a study that looks at "nature," and can be helpful in analyzing the character of Cal and looking at the theme of timshel--does he actually have a choice? This helps also in the analysis of Cathy's character and her antisocial personality.

(2) Sternberg, Robert J., and Elena L. Grigorenko. Environmental Effects on Cognitive Abilities. N.p.: Psychology Press, 2014. 40-43. Web. 21 Mar. 2016. [Online Book]
This source has information on child development, especially how families affect the mental growth of children and early teens. This is important for the character of Cal, who was raised in a very dysfunctional home and was therefore affected by his circumstances. This focuses, therefore, on "nurture."

(3) Cavarero, Adriana, Angelo Scola, and Margaret A. Groesbeck. Thou Shalt Not Kill: A Political and Theological Dialogue. N.p.: Fordham University Press, 2015. 7-10. Web. 21 Mar. 2016. [Online Book]
This is a good source because, obviously, it discusses the law of murder, particularly in relation to morality. This is a central idea in the original story of Cain and Abel, and it is important in understanding the parallels between the Biblical story and the versions shown in East of Eden, especially in relation to Cal's character.

(4) Verene, Donald P. "The Sociopath and the Ring of Gyges:: A Problem in Rhetorical and Moral Philosophy." Philosophy and Rhetoric 43.3: 201-21. Web. 3 Nov. 2010. [Journal Article]
I wanted to do some research on sociopaths since Cathy has so many sociopathic tendencies. This source was generic enough to be easily applied by specific enough to be helpful. This type of reserach is important in a further study of morality--if a person is hindered from understanding morality at all, is timshel still an applicable concept? How far do personal choices go? This will allow me to expand more on Cal's character as well.

(5) Montes, Maria J. "A Response to Ronald G. Alexander's 'Personal Identity and Self-Constitution' and Michael Goodman's 'A Sufficient Condition for Personhood'." The Personalist Forum 8.1 (1992): 91-96. Web. 21 Mar. 2016. [Journal Article]
This is another article about morality, though it is more an evaluation of morality in general as it applies to all people. This will also help me to further look into the idea of timshel and the morality of each of the characters, especially Cathy and Cal.

(6) The Holy Bible. Salt Lake City: n.p., 2003. 9-10. Web. 21 Mar. 2016. [Book]
This is the source of the original Cain and Abel story, which is clearly very important to the analysis of East of Eden. In order to understand the two versions of the story that Steinbeck presents, it is good to see the original views of morality and sin. I think this will help me most with Cal's character and analyzing his character through a moral lens.

Symposium: Killer Presentations

I was able to attend the symposium on Friday morning in one the lecture rooms with the Criterion Winners. I was able to hear two of the presentations. The first (and I'm embarrassed to say that I wasn't paying enough attention at the beginning to catch her name) gave a fascinating lecture about the use of murder in the work of Edgar Allen Poe, Alfred Hitchcock, and Thomas De Quincy. De Quincy was influential in the ideas of Poe and Hitchcock, and all three were intrigued and even full of admiration for the art of killing, as they "saw murder as an artistic opportunity." The speaker talked about how murder is used in their literary works to improve or humanize the hearts of the characters. For example, in Hitchcock's Psycho, the character Norman believes that his murderous actions are preserving his heart's love for his mother. One of Poe's characters, Hop Frog, commits a murder of revenge for his own freedom and peace of heart.
This was the most helpful presentation for me in terms of progressing my own paper, which is an analysis of East of Eden. Because murder is such an important part of the original Cain and Abel story, it is also something that should be considered in this retelling. I loved the idea that murderous characters are trying to preserve or better a heart, whether their own or someone else's, since Cal's actions always come from a place of sincere desire to protect his own heart. This brought a new perspective to this book, which gives me other subjects to research.

Some Pre-Writing

I did some informal pre-writing as I started reacquainting myself with East of Eden. I started by talking with a good friend about her opinions on the book. It's one of her favorites but she hasn't read it in a while. Then I skimmed through the book and picked out a few key quotes. I was going to draw out some key elements of plot and setting, but I ended up drawing some of characters who, in my opinion, are the key characters (either for being interesting or influential).
I might use some of the other pre-writing techniques later in the writing process, like the idea cluster chart or the post-it notes.

East of Eden

I've been thinking about researching East of Eden by John Steinbeck. This epic novel is significant for the literary world and for Steinbeck himself--it is one of his most important works. For him, this was a novel to teach everything he had learned about morality and humanity. It is a bold allegory based on the classical Biblical story of Cain and Abel and is shown over several generations.
I don't know what specific topic I'm going to write about yet, though there some excellent themes about agency and morality and fascinating characters. I'll be thinking about that over the next few days.

Some interested audiences may be:
Discussion board on Goodread for East of Eden
Book comments on Barnes and Noble or Amazon for East of Eden
Blogs such as: http://www.everythinghurts.me/blog/2016/2/6/a-story-of-our-pain-then-and-now
                        http://thewelltravelledlayne.blogspot.com/2016/02/favourites-from-book-club.html
Websites such as: http://www.steinbeck.org/ (for both Steinbeck and for East of Eden)
                            https://www.facebook.com/EastOfEdenTemporary/
                            https://www.facebook.com/John-Steinbeck-Author-262171857294892/?fref=nf
  My fellow book-nerd friends                  

The Research So Far

So far I have just been researching since I want to collect more information before I start revising my first draft. I've been looking into articles and books about ambition, pride, loneliness, and the relationship between cancer patients and their doctors or caregivers. This will help me expand on my thesis and discuss the similarities and differences between Vivian and Jason.

I've found the ebrary to be very useful in helping me find books or articles that I can use and then letting me save them and mark the parts that are important for me. I think it will help a lot when I go to make the outline and revise because I will waste less time searching for the research that I've already done.

Wit Prewrite

It feels kind of weird copying my whole essay to a blog post... But here we are! Very briefly edited version of my essay:

In Margaret Edson's play "Wit," a professor Vivian Bearing is diagnosed with stage-four ovarian cancer. She experiences physical and emotional trauma but is assisted through the process by her ambitious but narcissistic research doctor Jason Posner and her selfless nurse Susie Monahan. Vivian experiences a transformation as she faces her trial with the help and perspective of her life's work--the poetry of John Donne. One of her previous students was, in fact, her doctor Jason, who dedicated himself just as devotedly to her passion--cancer research. But although both of these characters ave great experience and intelligence, neither Jason nor Vivian could have found the answer to their most important questions because of their blinding pride and their solitary search.
Vivian Bearing was no doubt a great contributor to the research of John Donne's poems. She began early as a student struggling to find meaning in these poems. She continued her search into her career. In her classes, she taught each poem with precision. She expected complete understanding from her students, and set the example by continuously writing papers and researching about these great poems.
However, her success came with the price of constant dissatisfaction. She was never pleased with her students' work and never satisfied with her own evaluations. The poems were her world, but they presented questions that could never be answered. Jason, as a former student, explained to Susie that Donne's poems struggled with questions of salvation but could only quantify the possibilities, not bring any meaning. Donne's search--and Vivian's--could never be over. She sacrificed too much for too little as she gave up creating meaningful relationship. Even while in school, when she came across a difficult poem, she retreated into the library to figure it out for himself. She chose to walk this endless path alone.
Jason, too, was a researcher with experience and incredible skill. He was ambitious; he took the three most difficult college course--one of them Professor Bearing's--just to prove that he could. He was a focused researcher and was confident in his vast medical knowledge. Vivian's lead doctor trusted Jason to be a contributing member to this research process.
But just like the cancer that he studied so enthusiastically, Jason over-expanded himself. When knowledge was available to be found, there were no boundaries in his mind, not even a person's well-being. Jason despised working with others because he felt they were holding him back--but he was too proud to take their advice and too selfish to care how they felt. When treating Vivian, he saw only a tool of research, not a person with limits and emotions, and this was his downfall. He ignored the wise council of others to take Vivian's rapidly deteriorating health into account, but he refused only for the sake of his research, and this is what caused Vivian's eventual death. This source of research was lost, and ultimately Jason's test failed because of his stubborn pride and completely boundless ambition.
Ultimately, both Vivian and Jason sought for a prize beyond personal intellect, though this was the medium through which they sought-they were looking for satisfaction and happiness. But neither of them could ever find it this way. They both refused personal relationships and outside help, which doomed them to failure. Because of their pride and solo searching, not even their great intelligence and ambition could allow either Vivian Bearing or Jason Posner to find the answers to their deepest questions.

More Analysis

Preliminary Analysis of "Wit"

(1) Camera close-ups. Just in the first scene, the faces of Vivian and Dr. Kelekian take up the entire screen, which gives the audience the sense that they are meant to experience these scenes very personally.

(2) Breaking the fourth wall. Clearly this is written into the play, but Vivian's direct gaze into the camera draws in the audience and makes them part of the story. Our opinions matter. Even our attention to her story and its details matter, since she invites us to be part of it with her.

(2) Lighting. There is always a white light, whether from the window or a small light in or outside the room, but the light never shines directly on Vivian's face (at least while she is in the hospital).

(3) Music. The music reflects Vivian's experience--usually quieter, almost lethargic and nostalgic, with brief periods of tense and frantic chords.

(4) Flashbacks. Vivian's memories are seen in very real detail through her own eyes, so her memories and her current state is often intermixed. These experiences make up who she is, so they are seen in real time (in her current state).

(5) Emma Thompson's performance. Her acting emphasizes her relationship with Jason vs. Susie. Around Jason she is formal, stiff, and uncertain. He makes no effort to befriend her; when he gets engaged in conversation with her, it is to talk about his work and interests. Around Susie she gradually becomes more comfortable, even laughing with her. She is honest with Susie, even though emotions are difficult for her.

(7) The character of Jason. There are many thing to be said about Jason, but the thing that stuck out to me in the film was his obsession with cancer. He was fascinated with it because the cells multiplied endlessly, which is, as he says, "an error in judgment." The same thing can be applied to Jason himself as he makes crucial errors in judgement.

(8) The character of Susie. As with Jason, there are many things to be said about Susie. Almost ironically, it is Susie with her kindness who could have caused the experiment (Vivian's treatment) to be a success. She insisted that they have mercy on Vivian, but because the "experts" ignored her and Vivian's obviously horrendous condition, the treatment was a failure.

(9) Language. John Donne's poems mean everything to Vivian. She hides behind her words; we see her turn to poems in moments of distress or solitude. She turns to the poems for comfort and also for escape from her situation and from herself.

(10) Theme. There was a focus on knowledge and its cost--yes, it's beneficial to be inquisitive, but if the cost is humanity, then it is not worth the price.

I tried to keep these short and sweet so I wouldn't expand on/analyze anything too early in the writing process.
I could look at 7, 9, and 10. Both Jason and Vivian make an essential error in judgment by believing that getting information and gaining knowledge comes above all else. We see this in Vivian during her memories--she did not care about her students as much as she cared about the work they produced. Jason shows this through his narcissism and impersonal attitude with everyone--he cares only about his research and looking like the smartest person in the room at all times. We see that when their walls are dissolved--Vivian's words and Jason's perfect performance--they have to live with themselves. It is clear in seeing Vivian's deep regret and guilt that it isn't worth it to be smart if all personal connections are severed in the process. She pays the price later when she is the one being used for information and her well-being is not even considered.

Working Thesis Statements
(1) Both Jason and Vivian were consumed with the things that represented them best--Jason longed to increase his knowledge and status without restraint, and Vivian had planned to search within words forever for companionship, which she could never have found.

(2) Although they were both intelligent and ambitious, neither Jason nor Vivian could have found the answer to their most important questions because of their blinding pride and their solitary search.

(3) Although they both made great contributions to their respective fields, Susan had more success than Jason, since ultimately Jason's project failed when Vivian died while Susan excelled in her role as Vivian's nurse before and after her death.

More Thesis Stuff

I chose to look at the thesis for "The Hypocrisy of Henry V." I am far from being an expert at this thesis-labeling thing, so feel free to correct me wherever it's needed.

Original: "His hypocrisy, then, must be more the result of an awareness--calculations rather than simple charisma, diligence rather than luck--and this is what makes Shakespeare's King Henry such a capable king."
This seems to be causal claim. He explains that King Henry's self-awareness causes his                       hypocrisy and these things are what cause him to be a capable and successful king.

Edited: "Shakespeare's King Henry is hypocritical but also aware of his abilities and responsibilities and he is purposeful in his actions, which make him a very capable king."
I used this as a definition claim. It focuses more on King Henry's character and his traits rather than what caused those traits to be or how they are shown in the play.

Thesis Statements

Here are my (albeit sloppy) proposed thesis statements for W;t. There are many important formal elements in this poem, but these are the ones that stood out to me.


[Policy]: Vivian's formal diction shows her complete devotion to her work, but she finds that words fail her when it matters most because she regrets not having worked with compassion and love.

[Definition]: Although it is not a prominent part of the play, the minimalist setting is a medium for major character development for Vivian, as shown through internal monologues and meaningful conversations.

[Comparison]: It is true that Vivian and Susie are very different characters at the beginning of the play, but the characters of both Jason and Susie show different aspects of Vivian's character as her progression is shown through flashbacks and conversations.

[Evaluation]: Each of the characters went into their careers because of their passion for the work, but Vivian and Jason through their selfishness and Susie through her compassion show that the most meaningful careers are created when done with love and goodness.

[Causal]: Although she found pride in her career, Vivian came to see at the end of her life that true joy comes through her relationships with others as she began to form and cherish true relationships.

First Thoughts on TLC

I thought this was a fascinating play. These are a few of the formal elements that stood out to me throughout the course of the play:

Tone:

• The tone supports the words that each of the characters speak. 
• Vivian knows herself to be highly respectable professional and prides herself on her well-earned reputation of being very strict but also successful and intelligent. She uses stiff and highly intellectual words whenever she can. 
• Jason is also very professional but flippant and apathetic when speaking about the needs of others. 
• Susie uses many affectionate terms and has a careful but open tone.

Language:

• Vivian uses elegant, elaborate vocabulary to express herself, and takes words very seriously. They are important enough for her to research, memorize, and understand the medical terms that she must hear so often. 
• She builds these walls of words around herself to make herself feel comfortable and important, but ultimately, words can't save her. During some of her most vulnerable moments, she can't seem to find words at all. 
• She comes to realize that the words aren't enough to make her feel loved, and although she never loses her love for literature and beautiful language, she does turn more and more towards human kindness and love.

Characters:

• The characters seem to relate to each other--Jason and Susie represent Vivian at different points of the play.
• Jason is so engrossed in his work that he is self-absorbed.
• Susie is compassionate and cares for the needs of others without pride.
• Vivian had slipped into an obsession with words and had forgotten how to love others, but as the play progresses, we see her becoming more sensitive to her own emotions.

Writing Plan and Record: Courtney Smith

(4) 1/16/16, 10:12p

Specifically in regards to genre and language, these poems are fascinating. Both are lyric poems, with an emotional transparency; this clear expression of emotion is often portrayed in metaphors. They also have aspects of metaphysical poetry, especially "The Exstasie"--there are complicated and even obscure metaphors and the thought process is very intellectual. There is also an almost paradoxical relationship set up between the spirit and the body (or the spiritual/emotional and the physical). With both poems, the beautiful and emotionally-charged language make the metaphors/conceits meaningful the reader; where the comparisons could have been confusing, they instead help the reader to understand the relationships in the poems and recognize what they are feeling.

(6) 1/18/16, 8:21p

Both poems are beautifully written and clearly meant to be spoken out loud--this is an indication of it being a lyric poem, as it almost sounds like music. There is a more complete feeling to the poems when they are read as snapshots of stories--Richard Burton read the lines as sentences, without stopping awkwardly at the end of every line, which made it more real and complete. The tone was more clear this way, which heightened the emotion of the pieces. It was easier to hear the narrator's sincerity and love as we (the readers) follow his thought process through the poems.

(8) 1/18/16, 11:03p
Prewrite--essay outline

(10) 1/19/16, 9:42p

The first draft of this paper took me about 45 minutes to write.
I was able to get all my thoughts on the paper in a relatively organized way, which was good. I think I did thoroughly support all my points and have all these points lead to a solid conclusion.
I am worried, however, that I didn't completely fulfill the purpose of the assignment--which is, of course, the point. Did I look at formal elements? Yes. Did I do a complete formal analysis? I'm not sure. In the past, this would have been a good essay, but who knows what good that'll do me here. At least I tried!

Long- Distance Relationship To-Be

This is the "preliminary formal analysis" of John Donne's "A Valediction: Forbidding Mourning." 

Genre: This has characteristics of a metaphysical poem.  Firstly, it is a poem about love. There are also unusual or obscure metaphors, such as the comparison of their love with the movement of two compasses. He explains that because they are in love, they both “[make] no show/ To move, but doth, if the’other doe.” It is a sonnet, with 36 lines broken into four-line stanzas written in an ABAB pattern.

Narrator: A man, assumingly John Donne, leaving his love as he goes on a trip. He cares deeply for this woman and softly proclaims their love to be “so much refin’d” and not limited by physical distance.

Setting: The setting of the sonnet is ambiguous; what we do know is that the two lovers will be in different places—“moving of th’ earth” – very soon (since this is a poem for a moment of parting). If we assume that the narrator is John Donne, then the author’s setting is most likely late 16^th- early 17^th century England.

Characters: There are two characters in the poem. One is the narrator, who is leaving on a trip. He seems to be a man of conviction who is very much in love. He gently discloses to his lover with a certain amount of pride that their love goes beyond a “dull sublunary” love so that they are “two soules…which are one,” even when they are separated by distance. Readers can assume that this woman returns the speaker’s love and “hearkens after [him].” They both seem young and clearly devoted to each other.

Plot: There is no immediate plot during this poem. It gives the sense of being on the edge of an event, perhaps an event about to begin, which is the man’s trip away from his love. There is more focus on the emotion of the scene, with the narrator comforting his love to not “sigh-tempests move” as he travels away, but to be assured that he will return “where I begunne.”

Diction: Donne uses figurative language to paint a picture of the relationship shown in the piece. There are many metaphors, such as their love being  “like gold”—most spread out but still precious and beautiful—and their souls being like compasses, always pointing in the same direction. He even starts the work with the imagery of “virtuous men [passing] mildly away” to assure his love that she should not fear, but should be happy and have hope in a bright future together.

Tone: Generally, the piece is tender and reassuring. The tone shows a quiet but complete confidence in his (the narrator’s) relationship. He is familiar and affectionate with his lover, with whom he shares a love he describes as “much refin’d.”

Rhetoric: The narrator is using a primarily persuasive tone. It is gentle but encouraging as the speaker tries to convince his lover that they truly are meant to be, and that this distance will never hinder their love. He wants this for her, so she will not weep "teare-floods" as his absence, and also for himself and his piece of mind as he is away and upon his return.

Visual Design: Again, the poem is split into nine four-line stanzas. The ABAB pattern is laid out in the format. Each stanza is also separated to make the piece more reader-friendly.

Textual Awareness: There are no direct references to other poems or pieces of literature. There are certainly comparisons made, but nothing to connect this piece directly to another work.

...Well, I tried!

The Past and the Future

                Throughout high school, Courtney was exposed to plenty of literary analysis. For example, during junior year she wrote an in-class essay every week; she looked at poetry, short stories, even articles. One would think this experience would make her an expert, but sadly, she still has a lot to learn.

Courtney has both strengths and weaknesses as an academic writer. Some of her strengths are

·         organization and structure of the paper

·         strong diction

Some of her weaknesses include

·         honing in on the most important aspects of the piece

·         lack of confidence in her creativity

Courtney knows how to tell a teacher what they expect to hear. She likes being right—as human beings do—so she learned early on how to repeat back any themes, genres, or figurative language that the teacher has explained in class, of course with solid diction and in logical paragraphs. She does this very well, in fact. But as she grew older, teachers began expecting her to “think on her own” and “express creative ideas.” However, she recognized that when a teacher says that “there is no wrong answer,” they really mean that “there is more than one right answer.” There are clearly incorrect analyses. And as a perfectionist, she is often afraid to meander off the well-used paths of past analyses and come up with something “new” or “creative” in case it is incorrect or even insignificant. She did learn how to express her own ideas with time and practice during her later high school years, though that seems insufficient for college-level formal analysis.

 Even for this assignment, Courtney feels inadequate. She hasn’t written literary analysis since last year, and even then it felt brief. She feels like she won’t be completely sure what skills she’s retained and lost until she begins the writing process. Will it be like riding a bicycle? Will she miss the mark completely? That option wouldn’t be so bad if it didn’t affect her grades. But either way, this will be an important literary experience.

No Pain, No Gain

                Migraines suck. This isn’t an opinion—it’s an unfortunate truth. I’ve had my fair share of these horrible headaches, and they’ve caused me a lot of pain and wasted time. But I’m not to blame for having to deal with them—it’s really J. K. Rowling’s fault.

                One afternoon, my dad strolled through the door to announce that he had purchased the recently- released Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. I was an avid reader, and my interest was piqued. He told me that I couldn’t read this book until, of course, I started from the beginning of the series. Bring it on, I thought. I picked up Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone and started to read.

                The next day I had my first migraine. I remember lying on my bed, curled in agony, as I listened to my mom’s side of the phone conversation with the hospital.

                “It started about an hour ago. She’s just been reading… No, since yesterday… Harry Potter. She’s read the first book and part of the second. Probably about five-hundred and fifty pages… Yes. She’s ten years old.”

                For a single almost-weightless moment, it didn’t matter that I couldn’t see anything or feel my hands, and I didn’t care that my temples felt three sizes too big for my head—I was proud of myself. I had read books my entire life, but now I felt like I was really a reader. This was now a part of my personal and permanent identity.  I felt like I had been given full permission to truly love books and to dive into the fascinating worlds and complicated characters that had captivated me for hours on end. The doctor suggested that I read less, but I was a girl in love. There was no way to stop me.

                Years later, I felt a familiar tug in my heart when I read Shel Silverstein’s “Invitation”:

If you are a dreamer, come in.

If you are a dreamer, a wisher, a liar,

A hope-er, a pray-er, a magic bean buyer…

If you’re a pretender, come sit by my fire

For we have some flax-golden tales to spin.

Come in!

Come in!

I had been a pretender by the fire long before I read these words, and I felt like it was my own voice echoing off the page. I had come to love the sound of turning pages and the smell of new books pulled right off the shelf. I still reached for the moments when I forgot that I was reading and instead was experiencing the text as if these characters’ lives were mine. I even lived for the moments when I slammed the book cover, horrified, and realized that maybe “the real world” wasn’t so bad. I had learned what it was to be alive, not just to live, and what a person could do when they really put their mind and heart into it. I didn’t just want to be human—I wanted to know what it meant to be human, and I wanted to be the best kind of human that a person could be. Some of my greatest memories were preserved in paper and ink.

I knew how it felt to be a wisher and a liar in a hundred different lands by a thousand different names. I understood the price of magic and of hoping for a happy ending. I had brought my own sloppy tales to this fireside—maybe not gold, but silver or bronze, and I was content with that. I celebrated others who loved words the way I did, and I invited anyone and everyone to learn with me. I loved that this invitation—“come in”—did not imply overwhelming requirements. Come as you are, flawed and longing for more out of life, and you will find solace here in these pages. Pretending isn’t so bad when it’s presented inside a book cover and requires your greatest imagination. Perhaps in putting on a mask for a few hundred pages you will discover goodness and greatness in yourself and in your world.

This journey of self-discovery takes commitment and even sacrifice. It’s true that I have suffered pain for my passion of books, both physically and emotionally. But I have gained much more that I have given. If it is true that knowledge is power, then I owe nearly every powerful cell in my being to a book. It is as simple and as profound as that.